November 14th, 2012 12:12AM
Hello, World! As I was hanging out of Seth's mouth tonight, I got a chance to see most of the game, so I figured I'd share some of my thoughts and observations from the best seat in the house: Seth Curry's outer facial area. I know this sounds a little bit like the pot calling the kettle black, but is there a more useless piece of basketball equipment than Alex Murphy? We also might need to start thinking about benching Mason more. I was a little worried at the end of the first half when Mr. Poythress came running all mean-looking at us, but when Seth chose to fall down and they called the offensive foul I knew he had done the right thing. I was so proud of Seth, because he works so hard on that in practice. That's also why I was cheering so hard for Ryan when he arm-swept Wiltjer. So many of our guys could play Euroleague. You can see me screaming and pumping my fist if you slo-mo the replay on Youtube (I'm the piece of plastic hanging out of Seth's mouth). When Rasheed got hot there I was thinking about switching over and jumping into his mouth, but then I remembered that Seth is the best player in the world and that his mom would be washing me later. Don't get me wrong, Kentucky had a lot of good plays, too. But alley-oops don't win basketball games. Only three-pointers do that. Can anyone tell whether Quinn nods harder than Rasheed stares and claps? Aaaaiiiieeee!!! Sorry, I'm just so excited to get a win over the defending national champions, well, even if they didn't have any of the champions. I sure hope we don't have to be the team's best point guard, best shooting guard, and best small forward every game. That could really get tiresome. Ok, better run. I'm driving Julius Mays's Band-aid and Nerlens Noel's Box to The Accoutrement Club tonight so we can knock back a bunch of olive garnish and hit on some bra straps. Peace y'all!
'Til next time,